Nov 19 2009

Shame Indeed

Aram

cat-blackmails-you


Sep 27 2009

Love & Respect, Part 2

Aram

Here comes part two of some of my notes, thoughts, and impressions written down while enjoying Emerson and Sarah Eggerich’s incredible Love and Respect conference in San Diego.

-C loseness: Women say, “If you’re not lookng, you’re not listening.”
-O penness: not being secretly mad at her.
– Love her, even when you feel disrespected.
– Make sure she knows if you’re mad that you’re not mad at her.
– Women tend to personalize things. She’s sensitive because she cares.
– Men can compartmentalize their emotions. This too is a skill but it can cause men to be a mystery to women. “Why doesn’t he talk?”
– If you appear to be mad in order to motivate her respect, you’ll get more disrespect.
– It’s in her nature to nurture. She’ll question (interrogate) you but it’s because she cares.
– Has she been disrespectful? It could be because she feels unloved.
– Women don’t “just drop it”. They have needs that men don’t. They need to bring things full circle & have closure.
– As a man of honor, do what doesn’t feel natural. Talk, forgive, bring closure.
-L oyalty: We made an agreement at marriage.
– We need to constantly check on this & make sure we’re not even checking out the menu.
– She asks about your loyalty to be reassured, not for information.
– You can’t stay on the honeymoon forever. There’s more meanIng to marriage than that.
– Quality is always better than quantity.
-E steem: Treasure her above all others.
– Women have a different point systems. You can’t buy her affections.
– Sometimes what’s little to men is big to women.
– You want him to bring flowers & he fixes the faucet, so be patient. It takes a while to learn new skill.

Yes, I know I misspelled C-O-U-P-L-E, but I was mostly absorbed in the concentration of the moment. It’s a lot of material to pack into a day and a half and things move pretty quickly.

For the record, COUPLE is an acronym for men to use to spell “love” to their wives. It stands for Closeness, Openness, Understanding, Peacemaking, Loyalty, Esteem.

More later…


Sep 26 2009

Love & Respect, Part 1

Aram

We just got done attending an amazing conference at The Rock church is San Diego called Love And Respect, put on by Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs. What follows in the next couple posts is an un-edited, uncensored, off the cuff collection of insights, notes, and techniques presented. There may be spelling errors because they were typed up on my phone and my thumbs are clumsy.

I hope they’re meaningful to you!

-She needs love like she needs air. He needs respect like he needs air.

-Unconditional respect to him is as valuable as unconditional love to her.

-Men will serve & die for respect.

-Rhetorical question: Is it ok for your spouse to have a need that you don’t have?

-If good will exists, then most conflict is due to a misunderstanding.

-You can’t get what you need by depriving others of what they need.

-Is what I’m about to do/say going to feel unloving to my wife?

-Is what I’m about to do/say going to feel disrespectful to my husband?

Stay tuned for more…