Sep 27 2009

Love & Respect, Part 2


Here comes part two of some of my notes, thoughts, and impressions written down while enjoying Emerson and Sarah Eggerich’s incredible Love and Respect conference in San Diego.

-C loseness: Women say, “If you’re not lookng, you’re not listening.”
-O penness: not being secretly mad at her.
– Love her, even when you feel disrespected.
– Make sure she knows if you’re mad that you’re not mad at her.
– Women tend to personalize things. She’s sensitive because she cares.
– Men can compartmentalize their emotions. This too is a skill but it can cause men to be a mystery to women. “Why doesn’t he talk?”
– If you appear to be mad in order to motivate her respect, you’ll get more disrespect.
– It’s in her nature to nurture. She’ll question (interrogate) you but it’s because she cares.
– Has she been disrespectful? It could be because she feels unloved.
– Women don’t “just drop it”. They have needs that men don’t. They need to bring things full circle & have closure.
– As a man of honor, do what doesn’t feel natural. Talk, forgive, bring closure.
-L oyalty: We made an agreement at marriage.
– We need to constantly check on this & make sure we’re not even checking out the menu.
– She asks about your loyalty to be reassured, not for information.
– You can’t stay on the honeymoon forever. There’s more meanIng to marriage than that.
– Quality is always better than quantity.
-E steem: Treasure her above all others.
– Women have a different point systems. You can’t buy her affections.
– Sometimes what’s little to men is big to women.
– You want him to bring flowers & he fixes the faucet, so be patient. It takes a while to learn new skill.

Yes, I know I misspelled C-O-U-P-L-E, but I was mostly absorbed in the concentration of the moment. It’s a lot of material to pack into a day and a half and things move pretty quickly.

For the record, COUPLE is an acronym for men to use to spell “love” to their wives. It stands for Closeness, Openness, Understanding, Peacemaking, Loyalty, Esteem.

More later…

Jul 7 2009

Tips ‘n’ Tricks


Here’s a good one to pull on your wife. It sounds silly I know, but try it. Trust me.

  1. After you’re done having a phone conversation about some mundane things, call back in 5 minutes to tell your wife how great she is, or thank her for something she did, or tell her you just wanted to hear her voice.

I realize it’s not natural, but give it a shot. What can it hurt?

Here, let me put it in perspective. Can you imagine how you’d feel if she called you out of the blue just to say what an amazing husband and provider you are? Or how much she respects you? Not a bad call to get, right?

Why not beat her to the punch and do it to her first?

Jul 6 2009

A Quick Word For The Men


Do you remember her reaction when you first proposed? Was there any uncertainty that she’d say “No.”? Remember your preparation for the date? Remember the lengths you went to in order to make her happy? Remember how you showed you were crazy about her? Remember how you couldn’t wait for your life together to get started?

Now that your wife’s a sure thing, it’s infinitely more important to continue showing her you’re crazy about her. Keep preparing for dates. Continue going to great lengths to make her happy.

Let her know you can’t wait for the rest of your life together.